The Great & Powerful Oz

The Eve of New Year's Eve 2012

2011-12-30T21:10:00.000-08:00

Its the eve of the eve before the new year and I have excavated the link to this blog that I had abandoned for a while. But I am back. The last couple of years have brought change as years often do. Today, I am no longer in a band, which I sadly miss, but hope next year will bring more music regardless. The year promises to bring lots of change. I am going back to school again and this time I hope that I will find clarity of purpose and meaning as I prepare myself for a new career. (The exact occupation will be revealed when it reveals itself to me). All I know is that I want to help people and what that will look like I don't quite know yet. I am filled with gratitude, however, for this third (or fourth or fifth) chance to return to school. I really do like school and learning. I hope that I can put what I learn and what I have learned in life to us.

I will also be showing The Waribashi Project in an upcoming traveling show whose first stop is The Field Museum in Chicago, IL. I haven't been back to Chicago since I graduated with my MFA from the School of the Art Institute of Chicago. It will be challenging to be both in school again and preparing for this show. I am a bit anxious about it all, but looking forward to seeing Chicago again.

The above photo is from a recent trip to Limontour Beach, one of the loveliest places on earth and one of my favorite places. While I look at this photo I am reminded of the recent post I saw from a friend on Facebook. The debris from Japan's 311 tsunami is finally hitting the west coast shores of North America. It is said to be as large as the state of California. I don't expect it to be radiated because it was swept out to sea before the Fukushima nuclear plants had exploded. But that radiation, I am afraid, is not that far behind.

This photo was from this link.

Tomorrow Indigo and I are going to the Emeryville Marina to buy 4 crabs for a New Year's eve crab fest with two friends. We're having a very quiet new year and, of course, with good food. We won't eat it all in one sitting but the idea is that it may be some of our last crab until we get a better idea of what is really happening with the tons and tons of radiation that was poured into the ocean from Fukushima. Its weird that we are thinking this way, but the EPA, the FDA and the federal government in general are not very reassuring. Nonetheless, we will enjoy a quiet and probably very silly and delicious evening to bring in the new year. Hopes and prayers for our planet. Blessings to all.

Its a nail biter and we got married!

2008-11-03T01:31:00.000-08:00

Here are our pumpkins. I hadn't realized how close Halloween is to Election Day until this year. Like everyone in Berkeley, we are all anxious. Many of us are working feverishly at the Obama campaign offices, calling voters from home, doing outreach in the streets. Anything to shake this terrible feeling of anxiety - the "I can't wait until this is over but I am afraid of what will happen syndrome." Meanwhile, somebody (whose political affiliation shall remain tattered) sent out a fraudulent flyer telling voters in Virgina that, due to the large turnout, Republicans are voting Tuesday and Democrats are voting Wednesday. The things some people will do - that is downright unpatriotic and un-American. I think I consider voter fraud a type of domestic terrorism, don't you? Argh.

Meanwhile, since queer marriage is legal (at least until Tuesday), Indigo and I decided we better get hitched fast. Now most people would like the courtesy of being able to plan, but since we don't know how what the outcome of Proposition 8 will be, we took the opportunity to seal the deal. 18 years. Yep. 1-8. How many times do we have to get married anyway? Hope this one sticks.

Indigo is my hero. She has been bringing hot meals to the Obama campaign office for the phone volunteers there. On Saturday, I got to help her serve them her homemade pasta entree with homegrown tomatoes. What a bunch of happy people! Sunday she fed them baked potatoes with a few fixin's. Its great to feed the masses when one is too sensitive to talk to strangers on the phone.

Our plans for Tuesday night - mediate, watch the polls, mediate, party or mourn with others, meditate.

Its all about the cell

2008-10-06T21:52:00.000-07:00

Its all about the cell these day and about this long, strange mid-life crisis with its twists and turns. That's my excuse for not updating. I am a bad correspondent if you don't live in my house. Sorry.

Its biology, physiology and psychology all the time. I am enjoying it. My original intention was to go into prosthetics which is still a good possibility but because I like biology so much it is making me consider other options. Neurobiology? Biomedical engineering? I don't know anyone in these fields. Its going to take more research.

I am taking suggestions for my next career, so send me an email if you can think of a good career for a sculptor and musician with craft skills and an aptitude for science and math. The other day my sister said, "why don't you just go to medical school?" Hmm. She is a doctor already. I hadn't considered it seriously until she mentioned it. Maybe. It can't take too long. I'm not that young. 5-7 years max.

What happened to the art? Well, my lease ran out and my landlady wants to raise the rent. Temescal is doing well as a neighborhood. People say its hot and her insurance went up. Meanwhile the economy is tanking. I have no shows coming up. And I have no grants and no meaningful source of income. No, meaningful and income are the operative words. So I am in school, you see, and on this third time around, I hope I can actually look at the economic indicators and find a sustainable way to live and support my music and art. I always tell Indigo that I want to put money on her head. I do that when I get paid for my music gigs (and you know that's not very much or very often). This "money on de head" idea I got from having watched Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan, the late great Pakistani musical icon.

Years ago, Indigo and I saw him perform. (Twice, even!) At the performance, people from the South Asian community would stand in line to change dollars from big bills. At a certain point, people were permitted to walk up to him and toss the dollars on his head, to honor him. A guy from the production company would run around collecting all the dollars around the singer to help people change even more dollars.

Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan's performance was mesmerizing. He was a channel; a column of energy shined through his body out of the top of his head into the world. But, right now, the money on the head sticks with me. I liked the playful image of my countless dollars from the tip jar of a gig at some cheesy venue flying all over Indigo. Okay... just a few bucks. (And yes, while I am studying biology I am still playing the drums).

It is hard to think that he is gone now; his body now just cells recycled into the biosphere. No dollars where he is.

Susan Griffin Day

2008-04-10T07:08:00.000-07:00

Minal, Indigo and I went to Susan Griffin's first reading of her new book, "Wrestling with the Angels of Democracy". Her book is hot off the press and the Tuesday night reading in Berkeley launched the book tour. The City of Berkeley proclaimed the day Susan Griffin Day and the text of that proclamation read like a love letter. We all smiled on hearing it.

Need I mention that I have been an adoring fan of Susan Griffin ever since I found a copy of "A Chorus of Stones" at Moe's. I think it was the third floor display table. My hand just gravitated in that direction as if it were on a ouija board. I can't explain it. It was like a magnet and I had no control. I began to read the first chapter and found I could not put it down. From that point on, Susan Griffin's writings have been a great source of relief and security for me and have influenced my work as an artist.

One of the things I love about her writing is that she so eloquently weaves her journal writings with the telling of history (and science, philosophy, etc.). She calls it "social autobiography," the idea that one's life is embedded in context and history. And so we see her life story and how it connects to ideas, historical events, philosophy, poetry, movements for civil rights and a better environment. Its not just her life we see, but our lives, our history, the formation of ideas, the evolution of culture - the reality of being part of something bigger.

I had found "A Chorus of Stones," the year I went to grad school in Chicago and had to spend weeks at a time apart from Indigo while she remained home with her own art practice. I carried it around with me, relishing each chapter, wishing there was more to read when I got to the end and then starting over again. I was acutely aware of the everyday - that I was having so many experiences apart from my partner in a cold meat-eating smokers' city that this Californian would not bear for long. The book reinforced my connection to home, to social change, to why I had chosen to be an artist. Susan Griffin's book is right now on my desk and still vibrates with that magical energy that lead me to it 12 years ago. Sometimes all I have to do is hold it. I ate "The Eros of Everyday Life" after that. Couldn't get enough.

I have to say that the reading was beyond what I could have imagined because we ended up eating dinner with Susan Griffin at the after party at Cesar's. She signed my books and took a photo with me. I'm not going to post it though. Its in my phone.

Memories of the Loraine Motel

2008-04-05T07:21:00.001-07:00

Yesterday was the 40th anniversary of Martin Luther King Jr.'s assassination. I found this image of the Loraine Motel in Memphis on Travel Blog. Indigo and I were there during the southern leg of the Chinese Restaurant Project in 2004. We were doing part of the trip with recommendations from a travel book highlighting civil rights history and really wanted to go to the Loraine Motel which, since King's assassination, had been turned into a museum.

It was a cold and overcasty when we pulled into the parking lot. We sat in the car and stared at the big sign and the motel and that awful balcony. The image had been burned into our memories from our ethnic studies classes and documentaries and there we were. We looked at each other and burst into tears. All we could do was cry for a half an hour about where we were and what happened and how many people sacrificed their lives so we could be where we are today. It was so eerie to see and be in that place and yet so important to remember King and the people who fought so hard for us.

I saw images on the news of McCain and Clinton waving from the balcony and it felt kind of wrong. It felt like they should have been standing below in the parking lot looking up instead and not on that spot. I feel like that balcony is somehow, sacred, and no one should stand on it for a political photo op. But as a teacher once said to me, everyone wants to be happy and so I try not to judge it. I'll just notice that even though Martin Luther King Jr. has been dead longer than he was alive, his life and his death tapped into something far bigger than anyone can quantify and is still very much alive and I am grateful.

Johnny Nitro at the Saloon

2008-03-24T23:16:00.000-07:00

My blues workshop band opened for Johnny Nitro and the Door Slammers at the Saloon last night. Johnny, the blues master and our instructor, occasionally allows his students to start off his regular gig on Sundays. The Saloon is the oldest bar in San Francisco and because of that, this tiny place conjures up images of the city in its wild early days - 49ers (the gold seekers, not the football team), the red light district (which it is still a part of) and lots of booz (and there was a lot of it at the bar). Johnny told the crowd even, "When you have too many, have two more!" to help get revenue to the bar.

This band gets quite a sound with just guitar, bass, drums and sax. (No keys needed). I got to meet Robin and Burt. Robin, is Johnny's drummer who he told me about in class. She plays a mean shuffle and did all these subtle things that brought out the drama of the music. I love that. I tried to absorb it all. Turns out that she was also a student of my teacher Chuck Brown, who spoke very highly of her in my lesson today. She's got a cool Yamaha kit with a tight snare. Burt lays down a really beefy bass line. He and I chatted a bit about how he has been studying traditional Indian singing for the last two years. He will be going to a big Indian music in Delhi this year.

Its hard to do both instruments - drums and bass. Drums seems to be taking up most of my time these days. I feel like it will take me years. But its great to get inspired to play them both. Just got to keep carving those brain pathways.

Silvia, of course, played her sax, got on top of the bar and soloed, then jumped mid-solo and kept of playing. She plays with such energy and joy, I can tell.

Indigo and I danced a bit and then, lucky for me, I got to sit it on drums for the first part of their last set. Its so nice to play with the real deal. I had a blast. I think I'll be going to the Saloon again.

Our workshop band is playing at Cafe Du Nord this Sunday evening for our final performance along with all the other bands in Blue Bear's Spring quarter. I am also going to be drumming with the Jazz band on Wednesday night.

Buddha Collapsed Out of Shame

2008-03-18T23:55:00.000-07:00

I have been going to 7 programs at the San Francisco International Asian American Film Festival. Its that annual film marathon where we get to see films that we can't see anywhere else. One that really made an impact on me is a film called "Buddha Collapsed Out of Shame by Hana Makhmalbaf, an 18-year old Iranian filmmaker.

The film begins with the Taliban's destruction of the global treasure, the giant ancient Buddhas in Afghanistan. This is the setting for the story of a 6-year old girl who struggles for the right to go to school in a rabidly patriarchical society. We follow her traversing cliffs, trying to sell eggs in the market so she can earn the money to buy a notebook and pencil. She must also survive the stoning and war "games" of the boys acting out the reality modeled by adults. I found myself anxious and worried about the little girl throughout the entire film.

There is so much of reality in this film - the poverty and lack of resources, the deep desire to learn, the condition of the people of Afghanistan. It was more than a just a story. It was a glimpse of the hardship Afghanis, and their children in particular, must endure everyday. I was reminded just by watching that I feel very deeply about the welfare of children everywhere. It made me ask myself again "what can I do to make a difference?" What can I do for children? What can I do for girls? And I have been asking myself this a lot lately as I have been re-evaluating what I have been doing with myself for the last 20 years.

Speaking of 20 years...the organization that I co-founded, LYRIC, the Lavender Youth Recreation and Information Center is celebrating its 20th Anniversary. It is the largest LGBTQQ youth organization in the country and serves around 3000 young people every year. Its just amazing how it has grown and evolved. (Needless to say that such an organization could not exist in Afghanistan today). I will be serving on the 20th Anniversary Host Committee in hopes of raising awareness and money for the organization. As an adult I want to keep supporting young people to grow and become strong, confident, educated and powerful. Stay tuned for more later.

Activist Imagination and Drumming

2008-02-20T01:35:00.000-08:00

A few announcements. I have been working in the studio while trying to get over a relentless virus. You know that one everyone has been getting that starts off with a sore throat and then terrible sinus pain and drainage, low energy and just feeling yucky for about 3 weeks. Well, I have been busy in spite of it all.

First, "Activist Imagination", the project I have been working on for the last year is finally opening. I will be showing new interactive sculpture with sound. I am having lots of fun with simple analog electronics. Seems easier than controlling everything with a PC for some reason. Perhaps the project after this one, I'll give that a try.

Here are some deets if you can't read the postcard. Feel free to download and pass the postcard around.

"Activist Imagination" features work by Bob Hsiang, Donna Keiko Ozawa and Christine Wong Yap - February 29-May 24, 2008. Gallery Hours: Wednesdays and Thursdays 3-6 PM, Saturdays 2-6 and by appointment. Info: 415-503-0520. email: info@Kearnystreet.org. http://www.kearystreet.org/activistimagination

Opening Reception, Friday, February 29, 6:30 pm - 9 pm, Kearny Street Workshop Space180, 180 Capp Street, 3rd Floor @ 17th Street, San Francisco.

Artists Talk, April 24, 7-9PM

Closing Reception and Catalog Release: Saturday, May 24, 6:30-9:30 PM

I have also been working on blues and jazz in two Blue Bear workshops. This is where you can hear me next:

The Saloon, 1232 Grant Street, San Francisco, March 23, 9 PM, Wrong Side of the Road opening for Johnny Nitro and the Doorslammers.

Cafe Du Nord, Sunday, March 30, 8:30-9:10PM on the Main stage, Wrong Side of the Road (Blue Bear School of Music Blues Band with Johnny Nitro), Donation at the door, all ages welcome.

Cafe Du Nord, Wednesday, April 2, 7:30-8:10 on the Main stage, Infinitude (Blue Bear School of Music Jazz band with Jim Peterson). Donation at the door, all ages welcome.

Hope to see ya there!

Purple hair gone!

2008-01-15T23:28:00.000-08:00

Does this image scare you?

I talked it over with Indigo. I had scheduled a haircut today and wasn't really sure what to do. A trim? A new style? A different color? Short? Long? So she asked me lots of questions in the drive over to the city to my favorite hairstylist. "What are the options? What are you leaning towards?" Well, I realized, truthfully, that I wanted to have a break from being purple 24/7, from sleeping on a towel because I worry about staining our pillowcases, from using the old towels, from not knowing my true hair color anymore. This has been going on for a while. It felt really unnatural to rush to color it purple every 3 weeks. I have also felt burdened by the hair/gender signifier fussiness. Sometimes it can be a drag to be a rock star. While I am working in my studio - you know, that solitary thing artists do - I have no one I have to please or impress. With just a few weeks before the show (Kearny Street Workshop "Artist's Imagination), I really just want to roll out of bed and into the studio to work, then come home and practice drums. I want life to be simpler for a bit.

So when I sat in the chair, I told Joey to cut it all off. She was really excited to do it. "Donna, you're not afraid of change." So she did - buzz, buzz, buzz - down to 1/4 of an inch. She said she wouldn't have done it if I didn't have the head for it. And I saved the hair.. Stay tuned for what happens next...

CoverGrrlz Demo - Hot off the press

2008-01-11T15:24:00.000-08:00

At last, I am saying something about the latest demo of the CoverGrrlz with me on drums.

Here's a sample of audio from the CoverGrrlz's last recording session in December. I think we do a great version of the Rolling Stones' Can't you Hear Me Knockin'". We have been playing this tune for almost 2 years now. I think I survived this drumming epic fairly well.

There's more here too.

Tell me what you think!

My last CoverGrrlz gig - January 12th

2008-01-07T09:29:00.000-08:00

When we played at Vinnie's Bar and Grill in October, we were pirates. My last gig with the CoverGrrlz will be this Saturday, January 12th at the same place in Concord.
Show starts at 9 PM.

I've been playing with the Grrlz for a while. Most of us played in LICK, an all women's Rolling Stones tribute band and then moved on to form the CoverGrrlz to expand to other rock and hard rock covers. Ms. World Famous (guitarist and Blue Oyster Cult's #1 Fan), Kat Velour (Vocalist) and I have played in various configurations together for about 4 years, so I feel a bit of sadness about the end of a chapter with them. Melne is one of the best guitarists I know. And Rachel is the most consistent and reliable vocalist I have ever had the pleasure of working with. But its time to move on. I look forward to tearing it up with them one more time.

I am continuing my drum studies with Chuck Brown and possibly another drum teacher. I will be studying with bluesman Johnny Nitro at Blue Bear and Red House. And who knows what the new year will bring. I want to play more blues, R&B, and originals and just want to keep moving forward. I have been going to Eli's Mile High Sunday evening blues jam lately and have met some really great players. Sam Marshall, guitarist and owner of the joint, really knows how to shred. Last week he closed the jam with an awesome rendition of "Purple Rain" and I haven't been able to get the song out of my head since.

KFOX's Last Band Standing Quarterfinals

2007-10-25T10:03:00.000-07:00

The CoverGrrlz are out to get your vote to win KFOX's Coverband Contest. Voting ends tomorrow, Friday, at noon. The link goes to our website which will give you instructions on how to vote. Then sends you to the voting page.

Thanks for taking the time to help us win!

Rock & Opera!

2007-10-13T01:04:00.000-07:00

My friend Michele, a power-wielding net geek (stop drooling, Michele), told me it was about time that I blogged again. Sorry. I have been out of it. Okay. Here is it. I picked some great events to go to in the last few weeks. One of them was Lez Zepellin , an all women's tribute band from New York.

It was on a Wednesday night at Slims. Opening for them was my drum teacher Dawn Richardson's band, Dolorata. They sounded so good that night, that I had a vision of them going global and my being without a drum teacher while their success rages in big arenas. I will be so happy for them when it happens, so stay tuned because I am fairly psychic about these things.

Then Lez Zepellin came on and their phenomenal drummer Helen Destroy made my head explode.

She did the Moby Dick solo and beyond. I was stunned, awestruck, and practically fell into a heap. What a night.

Okay. Well, I had yet another great pick and I just saw it tonight. An old friend, Valentine Aguirre, is the executive producer of Carla Lucero's new opera production of Sor Juana Inez de la Cruz.
Cutting edge contemporary opera about Sor Juana, 17th century Mexican lesbian poet, writer, scholar. You know, I don't go to opera but Valentine got me to this and I loved it. Young vocalists, beautiful lighting, great casting. This is really a historically significant production. Very exciting to see. There is one more show here before they go to Madrid, so grab your tickets now.

Dinner with Johanna

2007-05-16T11:13:00.000-07:00

Indigo and I had dinner at Johanna's with friends, Susan and Barbara. Johanna (that's Johanna Poethig) just opened her multimedia installation show, "Driven", Togonon Gallery. Susan (whose last name I would include except that she's still trying on different ones) posed for one series of paintings (which I really love) where she is driving while drinking Pennzoil. I wish I had a pic to post of it. Its quite lovely. You have to see it. Its very cool.

Johanna and Barbara (that's Barbara Golden) are in the WIGband and what a bunch of nuts they are. They call it "trashy feminist" entertainment and gave us a taste of it at the dinner table, a song with clinical body part words to a playful melody. Hysterical. They have a show coming soon at 21 Grand on Sunday, June 10th. Stay tuned for a very funny time.

The CoverGrrlz had a great gig last Saturday at John Patrick's in Alameda. We spruced up the place with lights and swag. Melne's bicycling buddies came to dance and it was a surprisingly great party. I love it when we get to use our own PA system because it sounds so good.

This week I got some new threads from the Piedmont Boutique in San Francisco. This store is quite a little gem for stagewear and costumes. I have mentioned this to the band. Everyone's colors are there. Trix's blue and leopard skin. Win's pink. My purples and silvers. Kat's wild girl look. And Melne won't have any trouble finding an outfit to match her guitar (The Shineberger - see below).

We're at Grant & Green this Friday and the Hard Rock Cafe (at Pier 39) on Saturday where I'll be wearing my new duds.

The MacArthur Maze and Compassionate Driving

2007-04-30T23:29:00.000-07:00

I made it into the meditation class on "Transformation of the Heart: Practices in Generosity, Kindness, Compassion, Forgiveness, Joy, Equanimity, and Gratitude." I feel I have been learning something new every day. It has been especially helpful to meditate daily. I am grateful that there is something I can do that clearly has beneficial results in my state of mind and awareness.

I have been feeling rattled by the collapse of the MacArthur Maze yesterday. (Here are some great pics of it from the Oakland Tribune). The band ended up cancelling rehearsal because of the madness and unknowns on the freeways.

My buttons got pushed about the Bay Bridge and I-880 collapses during the Loma Prieta quake. Funny how the freeway structures seem to hold up some sense of security I have. Can I say I am so glad that it wasn't a terrorist attack, that the truck driver managed to survive and no one else got hurt? I am relieved it was just an accident. Perhaps it is also another funny kind of blessing that gets us to think about public transit, our addiction to cars and just ask questions about our current reality. Like, how safe is it really to have structures like the MacArthur Maze on landfill right on the Hayward fault? Why don't more people use public transit and can our current system support that use? Can we have empathy towards people who cause accidents?

The pic that I have posted is not of the tanker fire that caused the freeway collapse. Its a photo that I took while Indigo and I were vacationing at a cabin in Point Reyes. The fire was in the woodstove and it kept us entertained and warm all night. I am thinking of fire as transformative. In 1995, there was a fire in Point Reyes which burned 12,000 acres of a national park that is one of Northern California's beloved jewels. Today, the landscape and habitats have recovered and changed in ways that have made us appreciate that special place even more.(Here is more about that from one of my favorite magazines, Bay Nature.

In meditation class tonight a phrase came into my head - "compassionate driving" - mainly because there seem to be a lot of people worrying or being aggravated about traffic snarls as a consequence of the freeway closure and detours. I remember, in 1999, being awestruck by how Japanese drivers used the car horn to thank other drivers for their courtesies. When someone allowed another car to pass in front or turn first, the other would wave and toot toot. The horn was used as a friendly gesture towards a stranger. What a concept! Here in the US, the car horn is our next best thing to a weapon, an extension of our middle finger and a fast approaching closed fist. Can you imagine how much more pleasant daily life would be if we changed the meaning of the car horn and our relationships to each other while driving? I just stumbled upon a website that talks about compassionate driving. Perhaps that tanker fire and freeway collapse can also be seen as a transformative opportunity and not just an expensive inconvenience.

Schulze and Kindness

2007-04-16T13:35:00.000-07:00

Indigo and I recently watched the film,"Schultze Gets the Blues". I loved it. After watching it I felt like Indigo and I had travelled back to the South and revisted the things that we loved about being in Louisiana when we were there during our trip to photograph Chinese restaurants.

(Spoilers here, so if you want to see the film without knowing anymore, stop and go rent it!) In the film, Schultze, a recently retired German man who also plays the accordion, is suddenly obsessed with Cajun blues and Southern culture. His friends send him to Texas for a German accordion festival, but Schultze leaves the festival to see the Bayou on his own.

What is so great about this film is that it really captured the way that I experienced music in Lousiana and Mississippi (this was in 2004 just before Hurricane Katrina). Music was everywhere. It was in the air that we breathed. I remember walking into a music store on one of our walks through the French Quarter. It must have been the Louisiana Music Factory. A guy with a baby was tinkering on a piano. The baby was on the drumkit. Indigo laughs because I booted the baby off the kit and started playing myself. He played the twinkly New Orleans style and was really good. Another time, at the Delta Blues Museum, I found myself (with Indigo chuckling at me) sitting in drumming with guitarist Terry "Big T" Williams, who was teaching a blues band workshop. It was heavenly to play there and an honor. (Indigo wrote about it in her October 8, 2004 blog entry).

The film also portrayed Americans the way that I experienced us there - kind and generous and living with music in the most natural way. I was struck by how much I wanted Schulze to stay in the South. He seemed to have found his spiritual place. Everyone was nice to him regardless of language limitations. The magic word is kindness. I could really feel it there and in the film which represented Americans in a very loving way. I know how kind we can be. I have seen it from perfect strangers as well as experienced it from my friends. But I want to learn how to become that. I want to be around more kind people

And so I am thinking a lot about how I can further develop and encourage kindness in myself. One thing that has helped me is the classes that I have taken with the East Bay Meditation Center. Larry Yang is teaching a class called "Transformation of the Heart: Practices in Generosity, Kindness, Compassion, Forgiveness, Joy, Equanimity, and Gratitude." The class currenlty has 50 people registered and a waiting list (which I am on)! So I hope I get in. It seems to be the a good way that I can resist the madness of war and the self-centeredness that is happening in America today. It also seems to be the likely way for me to deal with the stress and sadness I have been feeling for that last couple of months.

Studio in Storage

2007-04-12T23:42:00.000-07:00

So here it is, my studio in its glorious pergatory, the waiting place. I actually have 2 more loads to go and so will fill this space up to the brim. It feels terrible. But then again, I am exhausted too. I also just recently had a session with Atava, one of my healers. I always notice how truly tired I am after she gets done with me. I have been forced to take naps everyday this week between packing and hauling. Indigo suggested that I stop looking for a studio for a while just to rest from this laborious and emotional process. So I will for a couple of weeks. So sorry, everyone, but my studio practice is on hold until this process is over. It may be a few months before things are up and running again

Crazily enough, I am in a group show, "Things That Go Up and Down," a Kinetic Art exhibition at Sean Fletcher's Office/Gallery (aka the offces of Rhodes & Fletcher, LLC) at 465 California Street in downtown San Francisco. Installation is Friday and Saturday. I will be showing some of my earlier kinetic pieces. The opening is this Tuesday from 7-9 pm.

On top of that I am giving a talk about my work, with a focus on The Waribashi Project, for the Creative Community Catalysts along with the fabulous Betty Biodiesel that very same night, Tuesday, April 17th from 6:30-9:30 at SOMA Creativity Center, 81 Langton Street, Suite 13, located off of Folsom between 7th and 8th Streets in South of Market District, San Francisco, CA. Here's the evite. How on earth will I be at both places at the same time? Well, I won't be. I'll be at the talk, of course, rubbing greasy elbows with Betty.

Then the following Saturday night, the CoverGrrlz are playing at the Fifth Quarter in San Jose.

Oh yeah and somewhere in there I have to do my taxes!!!

Studio Situation: Dismal

2007-03-28T05:28:00.000-07:00

I have been scouring the ads and been making appointments to look at studios while friends have watched over Indigo. My studio situation is down for the count. I have looked at some incredibly scrappy looking spaces, some asking for as much as $2/square foot. I think this is the end of an era. There is nothing available that can accommodate my shop so far and March 31st is my move out date. Not even a garage at an affordable rate.

Sigh. I have reserved a truck and am recruiting friends for the move. Unless a miracle happens, I am putting everything into storage until I find something. Or until I totally give in and sell my equipment. It feels terrible.

I am not the only one. (Here is an article written by Zelda Bronstein who ran for mayor in the last election. I voted for her but she lost to Tom Bates. Argh.) Recently, the folks at Fantasy Studios in Berkeley have been given eviction notices. We're talking award-winning filmmakers and other artists who have been working there for years. Other studio buildings are being sold and the rents are being increased. I think we are being run out of town, people. More here.

I ran into Polly F., an artist who owned the building of my previous studio, at Leo's Audio. She's playing a lot of music now as a fiddler. Then she told me that there had been a break-in at the studio ,which is in a drug trafficking area just a couple fo blocks away, and the building had been set on fire. The whole interior is burned out. There were long-time professional artists in that building. Its tragic. The spot I was in is still up, but who would want to be there now? Music does take up less storage space than sculpture.

I am remembering in the early eighties when I was at college in Massachussetts, a very formative time. My girlfriend was working with an organization called Nueva Esperanza in Holyoke that was being plagued with suspicious fires which burned down the homes of mostly low-income Puerto Rican families. These buildings were never maintained and the insurance collection on their torched lots was enormous. Block by block, the whole community was being displaced. The place looked like a warzone with the scorched rubble and grayness of abandonment. And, of course, the rebuild plan was for condos.

Today, I went to see a building in West Oakland which is being handled by a guy who runs a hauling business. He was trying to rent it out for the landlady with the least hassle possible because she keeps talking about selling the building. If that happened, he would have to move his hauling business. Apparently the landlady owns at least 30 properties in West Oakland. She bought this one for 30K in the 80's. Its worth more than 10 times that amount now without the building.

This building hadn't seen improvements in over 30 years, he said. It looked like you could blow it with a single puff or a little earthquake. It was a complete mess. I walked through what used to be someone's living space. Whoever was there hadn't been there for 4 months, the guy said.

There was so much junk there. He said he would get his guys to clean it up and it would all be gone tomorrow. He had been there over 8 years. There would be no lease agreement but the renter would pay on a month-to-month basis. The landlady didn't do lease agreements because it was too much of a hassle for her. Too shady for me, so I turned it down. But I did think about it. I think I am desperate now.

And while its seems the circumstances are different from Holyoke, MA in the 80's, a burned out studio still smells the same. There is a virtual colonial fire raging in the East Bay today but you can't see the smoke. It an "economic cleansing" that will leave low-income folks, artists, filmmakers, and haulers in the dust. More later...

Battle of the Bands and socks

2007-03-24T02:18:00.000-07:00

I just got back from our gig at the Hard Rock Cafe at Pier 39 in San Francisco tonight. The Battle of the Bands, they call it. Its really the battle of the fans of the bands - the idea being that people get to vote for their favorite band at the end. Well, we didn't win. But it was fun anyways. The sound system was pretty good in there. Melne did her usual "incite the crowd" with her wild running about with her wireless guitar. I gotta keep my eye on her so I can get those cymbal crashes at the right place. She is consistently on at most of the critical moments. And we're going to play there again May 19th. Its all good. Its all music.

As a new player, I get nervous so I am finding that its best for me to not "hang out" in the bar too long before our time on stage. I really need the prep time. I think meditation is helpful for me right before the gig and warmups on the drum pad, too. My lessons with Chuck are going well and I noticed all these things that I am doing wrong. I moved out of my "set position," as he calls it, the spot where you keep your hands, and I totally bruised my right pinky. Its the untrained movement of the forearms while striking the drums. Darn. Of course, during a gig, I usually notice all my weak spots, places where I just didn't get that fill and could have used one. Of course, no one is really analyzing to that level, but I have been noting everything. Maybe I can hear it all better now. Its kind of obsessive, you know. I feel that drive to work on it. Music is a lifelong journey.

Another especially great thing about music is that you don't have to store all your songs when you're done. They go into the air, into time, unlike sculpture. I am still looking for a studio, but it feels impossible. Some places are priced so high, I don't see how anyone would even consider it. Artmaking feels like it is becoming more and more unsustainable for me. I wish there was someone I knew who I could rent from, so I can help friends with their mortgage instead of a leasing company. Anyone out there who would like an artist in your two-car garage?

INDIGO UPDATE: We are going to a pool for water therapy. Indigo had her second session today. It makes her left leg feel wiggly afterwards because its compensating so much for the injured right pelvis. Its like Indigo is venturing out into space and has to face gravity again. The area around the pool is full of blooming apple blossoms which she loves. PT appointments, water therapy, laundry...

I sometimes make Indigo fold laundry while she convalesces on the couch. She helps me match my socks.

The Universal Key

2007-03-10T18:38:00.000-08:00

I just got back from a workshop with Allison Miller at the Berkeley Jazz School. Thanks to Amy Moon today, I got a little break from home. Indigo is beginning to test out walking after her accident.

I was one of 8 lucky people who signed up to hear nuggets of wisdom from a seasoned player. The first thing Allison wrote on the chalk board was "music is music." If you are an open-minded player, versatile player, music feeds other music. And she showed us this.

I have so far to go, is all I can say. Very humbling for me as a new drummer - the speed, control and facility of a pro player. Just magical was her placement of one stick on the snare. Then a 15 year old player volunteered to do an exercise with her where he incorporated the "Universal Key", the rhythm she showed us, into various styles of drumming. They played together and traded solos in a seamless stream of genres.

This is where I acknowledge the importance of youth when I suppose I had time, before I had to work for a living. Whatif whatif blah blah blah. You really can't do that. I just have the time I have now. I am home practicing rudiments and tunes for tomorrow's band rehearsal. We have gigs lined up through October. I have to practice at least 2 hours a day, if I want to feel like I am getting anywhere. Chuck Brown suggested smaller time blocks over the course of the day. I realize again and again that I want to learn so much about funk, jazz, blues, latin, etc. I'll play anything. Well, almost anything. Music is music. So I'm working on it. I know I'm striving to be a good player. That's all you can do but you can still have a good time. That, to me, is the universal key.

Indigo's Pelvis

2007-02-22T23:03:00.000-08:00

Its been a harrowing 2 weeks. My partner Indigo was in a horsebackriding accident. She seemed to be fine right after, until the "click" - what she thought was her right groin muscle. Turns out she has a cracked pelvic bone! Life has suddenly changed drastically. She has to be cared for in a wheelchair.

The MRI image, which I decided not to post, makes me understand how she landed when the horse bucked her off. No wonder it is so painful.

Its really a lot of work to take care of someone. We have been busy trying to adjust to this shift in our lives where she is very dependent on me, trying to come up with the tricks that make it easier for her to do things: the direction of the wheelchair for toothbrushing, the sequence of steps when she bathes, the timing of activities after pain medication, the process of getting in and out of the wheelchair. Details, new processes and routines. Tomorrow I have to figure out how to bring certain things from the upstairs studio to the downstairs so she can work, make phone calls, etc.

I also notice where we are getting our support. Our neighbors, friends, people who just responded to our calls of help. This is what friends and neighbors do for each other. Our neighbor Don is going to help me build a ramp. Jennifer, our friend and Feldenkrais practitioner has been coming over several times this week to work on Indigo. Atava, our friend and herbalist/bodyworker, is coming tomorrow to work on both of us. People are hanging out here while I am at a gig tomorrow.

We are both very grateful. I will remember this, the importance of generosity, when we get through the next few weeks of healing time. Thanks everyone.

Marie Kurihara and her mentorees

2007-02-06T01:17:00.000-08:00

Indigo and I had the priviledge of attending a lunch with my aunt, Marie Kurihara, and her students whom she had mentored in the 1960's - junior JACLer's. The JACL, if you don't know, is the Japanese American Citizens League, the leading civil rights organization in the Japanese American community. In the 60's, especially, young ernest Japanese Americans received training to be activists, lobbyist, and public servants at the JACL in San Francisco and its branches nation-wide.

My aunt is 85 years old and she has an amazing legacy, the details of which I am only beginning to understand. She has always been and still remains active in organizing in the community, her senior retirement complex and her church. But her legacy is far-reaching.

The folks at this lunch were very empowered and active in their own communities now. One woman, Maggie, was one of the founders of the beloved Berkeley institution, the Berkeley Bowl. Maggie now runs her own bakery, Margaret's French Bakery. She brought us two very lovely cakes - a Strawberry Grand Marnier and a Chocolate Raspberry Mousse Torte. You know I ate two pieces.

Another mentoree was Satsuki Ina, a filmmaker who received at 2005 "Best Director" award at the New York International Independent Film and Video Festival for her recent film "From a Silk Cocoon."

Other folks included an architect working on an affordable housing project in the South Bay, a former Washington lobbyist and art gallery owner, a non-profit director who is starting a scholarship in my aunt's name. (I'll get this info here shortly).

My aunt has always been a busy person. She never married or had children and but her influence extends beyond what one can really know. Everyone attributed their pride, their successes and drive to make the world a better place to Marie Kurihara. I learned from her example that you don't have to be in a traditional relationship or have children in order to build a legacy.

Finally, Auntie Marie talked about one of the highlights of her life - She was honored in the 1994 Congressional Record.

Thanks Auntie for your example. I hope I am as active and accomplished as you when I am 85.

In yo' eye, make yo' booty shine.

2007-02-02T02:21:00.000-08:00

I have had this photograph up from when I was a student at Marina Junior High School in San Francisco. This was the basketball team - the AAA Junior High School Girls' Basketball Champions of 1977. I'm the one fourth from the right, second row.

I loved this photo when I was a kid and still do. It says where I came from. Although, our school was in the Marina which was mostly "the rich white" part of town, the students came from other surrounding neighborhoods, Chinatown, the Western Addition, the Fillmore as well as the Marina. I was on second string. While, to this day, I might find it hard to admit it, the first string girls were much stronger players than I was. A few on the team I still run into now and then. I lost touch with most of them after we left for high school.

I have to point out Michelle Sanchez, the girl second from the right, top row. She was a phenomenal athlete. I mean really. I don't even know how to describe the tenacity of her playing. Focused, consistent and absolutely unstoppable. I remember one day when she invited me over her house. Her closet was filled with trophies, plaques and medals. Jam packed! "Oh my god!" I said when I saw them and she dismissed it. "My brother has more." I was stunned by it. To this day, no one I know has more trophies than Michelle Sanchez. I didn't see her brother's closet, so that doesn't count.

You probably guessed that the twins, the Woo sisters - Noreen and Kathleen, were on first string too.

When I look at this photo, I feel like I can still hear their voices like we were at practice. The girl on the top left next to coach Eliopolous was Wanda. Wanda was a funny, sort of quirky kid. She always sounded like she had a sinus problem. I can see her skinny arms moving around in the air when she tried to block my shots during scrimages. Her mouth was always open and her eyes got big. It was distracting and often worked to throw me off. She was a forward, first string too.

When someone made a shot while being guarded, you got to say "In yo' eye, make yo' booty shine." I think I got to say it once or twice.

Today, since I am playing a lot of music, I look at this photo and also remember what we were listening to then - Parliament, Earth, Wind and Fire, Brothers Johnson, Kool & the Gang, The Stylistics, Tower of Power, The Emotions, Heatwave, Santa Esmeralda, Brick, Deniece Williams, etc...We were "lockin and poppin" (its dancing, you know). I was also in the Advanced Band, but then I was a flute player and not a drummer.

Anyways, basketball. That was my game.

Raise more hell!

2007-01-31T23:02:00.000-08:00

I learned this evening from truthout.org that Molly Ivins passed from breast cancer tonight. I wished that I had met her. I am learning that one shouldn't wait to meet the people you admire because invariably they make your life richer and more hopeful just by being alive. I think she made me braver. Her voice made things more bareable. So, I regret not having seen her speak in person. I heard her on NPR once and she amazed me and gave me such relief - there are progressive and vocal Texans, you know. Thank you Molly. We'll keep raising hell. (Credits: The image is from www.timporter.com/ graphics/politics01.shtml).

I had lunch today with my aunt and another JA (JA= Japanese American) elder, Kathy. Kathy was telling us about the actions taking place on behalf of Lt. Ehren Watadawho is facing a court martial for refusing to deploy to fight in Iraq. His case is getting some media attention because there are community people support him. Kathy told me, though, that there are others who are in jail for the same thing and had no one watching their backs. Still, the outcome of his trial depends a lot upon the kind of pressure we put on to support him and to bring the troops home safely. Check it out and spare some time to bring back sanity. Raise more hell.

Why another blog?

2007-01-30T03:16:00.000-08:00

I have a lot more matters beyond chopsticks to talk about. So I decided to add yet another blog to an already overcrowded field of bloggers, if not to have readers, than to journal and to reflect. These are things that are unrelated to the Waribashi Project. That is everything else.

I am the drummer for the CoverGrrlz and "The Great and Powerful OZ" is my stage name. I have been studying drums seriously for the last 3 years with some excellent teachers including: Dawn Richardson, Marc Bernfield, and master drummer Chuck Brown. (Chuck doesn't have a website but you can read a little about him on another student's blog, the blog of Troy Sutton).

I have played the electric bass for about 15 years, but it wasn't until I began playing the drums that I began to play a lot more, and even enjoy music a lot more than ever. Music is physical, like sculpture, but drums are all about becoming rhythm. Everything that I learned about music has come together with drums. I feel like I understand music better now. At the same time, drums make me feel like I have so much more to learn, that it will be a lifetime of studying and playing. But I like that. It feels sustainable in ways that artmaking is not. And I have been feeling a bit out of touch with my studio practice lately. Artmaking is not cheap and is not easy in every department.

A couple of days ago, my friend and art studiomate Kathy informed me that our building is going to be put on the market very soon. I have to move my entire studio out and I have no idea where I am going to go. The East Bay is very tight on cheap studio space. I am afraid of what this will doto my art. If anyone out there knows about good spaces, please let me know. Meanwhile, I'll be packing up and staying close to the music.